Did I really say that?

With the ice and short-term loss of power, heat, and water, I've been spending more time in the house with the dogs than usual, and I've found myself saying some really stupid things.

Like, "Put that couch back where you got it."

"Get his leg out of your mouth."

"Quit humping your sister's head."

I tolerate animals, but my alter-ego absolutely adores them, and since she's the one who legally exists, she wins out. But six antsy dogs, none of whom like cold weather anymore than I do, is kind of like dealing with six antsy kids. (Except I can lock the dogs in their kennels, without threat of arrest.) I get that they have to amuse themselves. I also get that five males in one house is an invitation to chaos. I also get that Olivia may be the smallest and the only female, but by God she is determined to make the alpha fight to hold onto his rightful place.

But please . . . I'm an intelligent woman. Why do I have to constantly chide one or another for humping each other? (And why can't Shadow figure out the right end to hump?) Why do I expend tons of energy every day pushing the couch back across the room to the windows where it belongs? And why do I spend half of my day letting someone in, then letting someone else out? And they never want to come in/go out at the same time? No shit, I let Chance in, sit down, pickup my keyboard, and Beau needs to go out. NOW. So I let him out, settle in, and he needs to come in. I let him in, sit down, and Lucky needs to go out. I have no doubt they plan it among themselves via doggy ESP. "Okay, she looks comfortable now. You go whine."

That's why I have an office outside the house. (Well, truth is, my office is in the workshop behind the house because there wasn't any workable space inside the house when we moved in, not with the kiddo's music vibrating my desk all the time.) But now that we have six quadripeds, having an office to go is great. It's just Jack and me -- the others get kenneled. He's the perfect writing companion. He shares my lunch, and he sleeps. He goes out once in a while, stays an hour at a time, then comes in and sleeps. And I never have to tell him to put the desk back where he got it. Rachel10:40 AM